Sun Myung Moon
March 7, 1975
Barrytown International Training Center
Translator: Won Pok Choi
Photo date and location unknown
As I see things, Americans and Europeans don't miss their brothers and sisters; also, they don't seem to miss their parents as Oriental people do. In the Oriental part of the world, when children are sent to school, they are taught to be loyal and faithful to their parents, to their brothers and sisters, and to elderly persons. But I don't see that happening here. When you are in primary school, you don't seem to learn much about filial piety. Your parents, too, don't seem to be much concerned or drowned in love towards their children.
Perhaps it is the material wealth and abundance in your life that becomes an obstacle to loving your parents and brothers and sisters. You have enough to eat, plenty to use, and you lack nothing here. So, you don't think about your parents and brothers and sisters. But in Korea or in other Asian countries, they know what starvation means. The parents, whenever they find something to eat, although they are starving themselves must save something for their children. Also, children of filial piety, whenever they find good things to eat, immediately think of their parents. They will save those things for their parents, not eat them themselves. In that way, they are emotionally connected together.
Here you take all the material abundance for granted, and you just go ahead and eat. It is understandable that you don't have to think of your parents or sisters or brothers, when you have plenty to eat and plenty to use. I think that is one of the reasons for your not minding your brothers and sisters and parents.
In Korea, for instance, when you want to buy clothing, your mother has to save some money, a penny at a time maybe, by working for other families or by sewing for other people. Penny by penny, she saves the money. Your mother would save money to buy good clothing for you just once in a year or even two or three years. When you wear that clothing, behind the clothing is a beautiful story, and you cannot but remember your mother. Also, there's a beautiful, sentimental tie between brothers and sisters. Especially the elder brothers and sisters take care of their younger brothers and sisters, and they save money for the younger ones.
But here in this country, with all the material abundance, you don't feel such a sentiment for your brothers and sisters, or for your parents. You take everything for granted. For instance, you think it's your parents' duty and responsibility to raise their children. Your parents can easily send you to primary schools and high schools, so you don't know what it is not to be educated in those institutions. But in Korea or in other poor countries, parents have to go through much difficulty to send their children to school. So, the children know the value of being educated. However, whenever I tell you things about filial piety towards your parents, I don't see that you're too deeply moved.
In Central Park, New York, I often see elderly people seated on the benches. They look well-nourished and well dressed, but they look so lonely! I don't see any grandchildren around them, or any of their own children around them. They just keep sitting there, all through the day; towards the evening they retire to their own apartments, and I imagine they are very lonely there, they probably toss about in bed all through the night. Perhaps they are used to that, and they wouldn't want their grandchildren around them. Maybe they feel their grandchildren are obstacles. Why are they living that kind of life? Are they deserted by their children?
In Korea, parents and grandparents are always welcome in the homes of their children. They can even visit them at any time, even during the night, without letting them know about their visit. Here, you have to make a phone call and let them know, or even get their permission to visit the homes of your children. On the other hand, Korean parents can visit their children's home, and if they are absent, they can go to the kitchen and just eat anything. Or they can go to their bureaus, finding anything they want to use for themselves. They can use the money they happen to see in the drawers. Later on, they can tell their children, "I have used so much money from your drawers." Yet, they are very comfortable with each other. So, we see a vast difference between the Oriental way of life and the Western way of life.
Which would you think would be appropriate to build the Heavenly Kingdom on Earth -- the way of love that is applied in the Oriental part of the world, or in the Occidental part of the world? We are going to build a huge human family under the love of God as the parent. Everybody, without doubt, would think that the Oriental way of thinking alone can be applied to building the Kingdom on Earth. If you female members are married to a man who is living with his parents and grandparents, would you like the idea of being daughter-in-law to the parents, and always having to serve them and the grandparents?
Would you prefer to live alone?
As a bride when you first belong to the family, can you just stand still and have others come to you, to love you and serve you? Can you say to your brothers-in-law, "Come and serve me," and your parents-inlaw, "Come and serve me"? Can you do that? Which way would you choose: to live with the parents-inlaw or grandparents-in-law, or to live with your husband alone? You must start living as a servant to the family, always serving your parents and brothers in the in-law family. You must pass the test of your parents-in-law, and you must be OK'd by them. You have to pass the test coming from your sisters-inlaw, brothers-in-law, uncles, aunts, nieces, and nephews. Can you pass all those tests and be welcomed by them?
There's no discrimination between those who are uneducated or who are educated, in the family tie of love. Even though you have earned a doctor's degree, it doesn't count. You cannot be proud of yourself, saying, "I'm a medical doctor, I'm such-and-such, I have such-and-such a degree, you must serve me and you must think highly of me." You cannot say that. Maybe for the first six months you will try your best and get over all of the difficulties and pass the examination. But things are more difficult from then on, and you have your own children, and with the children on your back, you have to work in the kitchen, serving the rest of the family. Also you must love the children of your in-laws; you must love your nephews and nieces more than you do your own children, and take care of them more than you would yours. If there is scarcity, and there are not too many things to eat, if you hide something for your own children, never wanting to give it to the nieces and nephews, what would happen then?
In eating, too, suppose there's a certain amount to eat, you must feed your grandparents first, your parents, your uncles and aunts, your nieces and nephews, and then it is time for you or your children. As for clothing, the same thing applies. I don't think you can even understand the situation.
Your love-ties tighten even faster when you love each other, and like to have other people eat first, and other people clothe themselves first. When things are scanty and rare, you feel that kind of thing all the more. You don't feel that at all here, but you do when you have only a small amount to eat, when one of your family members is not there yet and you have to wait until he or she comes back to share with each other the edible and nourishing things. When one of your family members is late in coming back home, all the families will sit up the whole night waiting for him and sitting on the floor. You would have the person sleep in the warmer place. I'm afraid you don't understand the situation.
If you were in the position of God as the parent, as the Father, which way would He like? It would be very simple to live as husband and wife with nobody else around. But how would God take it? If you insist on the Western way of life, your parents cannot mix you like that, living together. If the daughterin- law wouldn't like to live with her parents-in-law, what would happen? They cannot help but live separately. Then what would God do? It is a serious question. Seen by Oriental eyes, Western people are merciless or feelingless or emotionless. You do things out of duty, but not out of sentiment and heart and love.
I'm sympathetic with you, because it is more than natural that you have become like that, since you are more used to that way of living. But which of the two--the Oriental or Occidental-is closer to the way of life of God? (Oriental!) Then does it mean that Western people are farther from God? (Yes.) Also, they are more materialistic. The materialistic people of the Western world must be taught by the Oriental way of life, in order to get close to God. The spiritual way, what is it like? Because your spirituality is closer to God's, you think of other people. In feeling sentiment, you are closer to the source of love. That's what we call spiritual or mental, instead of materialistic.
Roughly divided, when we look at the world, there are two attitudes toward life. One is more spiritually inclined, and the other more materialistically oriented. However, in the Western world, people are more or less tired of the materialistic way of life, while in the Eastern world people are the other way aroundmore or less tired of the spiritual way of life. So, people in the East have the tendency to seek after Western things while the Westerners are looking for Eastern things. So, in the Orient, people are faced with the danger of losing what they used to have. And in the Occidental part of the world, people are apt to forget about the importance and value of material wealth. If we add up what is materialistic, and what is spiritual, it will be wonderful to have it as our ideology, to steer our way on the road of life.
In light of the Divine Principle, how would you define God? What is God like? Would you choose material or love? (Love!) Would you prefer life to love, or love to life? (Love!) What would love mean without your life? But life doesn't have any meaning without love. Even though you have sensations, being alive but just existing without knowing love, would you call it life? (No.) Without joy or love, life has no significance. Joy and happiness is what you want, and both of them are derived only from love. So you think more highly of love than the value of one's life.
In the fallen world, what we cannot find is love. There's material abundance; there's your life, but you are unhappy because there's no love. So, love is more important than life.
We must clarify the order of love. Without knowing this the order of society will be confused and remain in chaos. Let us make it clear, right here. God made man first. When He created man, He created him out of his love. Can American women, who are used to lady-firstism, claim that love must be through woman, and woman must be the source of love, next to God?
The source of love is of course God, and from God it flows down through man, to reach woman. That's the order of love. Then some of you could ask back, "Well, how do you know if God created man first or woman first? That's a story made by a man." Let's expound on it from this point. Man resembles the whole universe. When we say "man," that includes both male and female. Man symbolizes heaven, while woman symbolizes earth. What is the proof of that? The order of love is defined from the way you love each other, male and female. Man looks down on woman, and woman looks up at man, isn't that true? That's the way God created man: man above, woman below.
Heaven is above because heaven resembles God more than the earth does. Let me ask you women members, would you want to be held by a man, or to hold a man? If I'm not wrong, women like to be held by a man. By being held, you will be lifted up, becoming higher and higher. When a woman wants to be carried by a man on his back, it means in that case that man plays the role of a ladder, and you step on the rungs of the ladder to become higher and higher. That means the man is in the central position. The structure of your body also tells which is which. Men are broader on their shoulders-the higher part-but women have their lower part broader. Since man is in the subjective position, it is woman who always misses the male.
The order of love, the history of love is that love comes from God through man, to reach a woman. The history of love is the history of creation or re-creation. Out of love God created man, and out of your love, you create or re-create. You imitate the creation of man by giving birth to your own children. When you look at your own children, you feel that God really created man through love. When you resemble God in loving each other, there is constant, incessant creation coming about. Isn't that true?
In America, love between the same sexes -- homosexuality -- is prevailing. It is a most unnatural love. At the time of creation, did Adam have any other man to love? Did Eve have any other woman to love? It is in the Principle that woman must love a man, and man must love a woman. Homosexuality is unnatural, against God's law of creation.
Men have the tendency to want to resemble God, and if you resemble God, you want to live His way. We have not yet solved whether or not you would want to have a boy baby or a girl baby. What makes you want to have a boy as your firstborn? At the time of creation, God created a male being first, that's why. I don't understand American women. They don't mind if they have a girl or a boy. I have just come out of the hospital today with a boy baby. In the hospital we saw many fathers who were so happy that they had girls! This is what I thought: in America, parents are more or less ill-treated by their sons when the sons get married, so they are apt to go to their daughters to live in their old age. That's not the law of creation. The law of creation says that when you die, you'd rather die with your sons protecting you.
Once you are married, it is natural for a woman to follow her husband. A Miss Kim, when married to a Mr. Park, would instantly become Mrs. Park. Why aren't you hurt? Because you don't Jose anything. You are gaining their family's heritage, what your husband has will be yours. His authority, power, everything will be yours. Suppose there's an uneducated, lowly girl married to the president of the country. Then she instantly becomes the president's wife. In that case, you don't get hurt.
In the Oriental countries, parents would like to have the firstborn be a son, without exception. Even from that standpoint, the way of thinking of the Oriental people is better and closer to God. That is because it's logical.
When you have children, you are in the position of parents, which means you are in the position of God to the children, to His children. So you must, in raising your children, be like God, caring for your children ·and loving them as God would. In the ultimate sense, you must raise your sons and daughters to be like God, to be as perfect as God Himself. What would a man who resembles God be like? Well, God is not only the symbol of power, authority, and things like that, but God is, before anything, the source of love.
So, you must raise your children to be the source of love to others. If your children become perfect as Heavenly Father is perfect, what will they know to do? They will transmit the parents' love toward their children.
There are three kinds of love: parental love, conjugal love, and children's love. There are no other kinds of love. As the central point, you must be able to love your parents above, love your spouse on the horizontal level, and love your children below you. Also, you must love mankind as though they were your brothers and sisters. Since the source of all three kinds of love is God, you can reach God through any type of love: parental love, conjugal love, or children's love.
Why should all three kinds of love be united into one? Because by having three stages, we must be able to build the four-position foundation. We have three levels of love, but to connect those things, we will need four positions.
When you are united like that, there is a continuous source of love flowing down. In that case, you miss your loved ones. The source of your love is your home. Isn't that true? What do you miss all the time when you are away from home? Home, nation, or world? (Home!) Why do you miss home? Because that is the fundamental core of the whole universe, the fundamental unit of the whole universe. And at the core there is God. Because of that, you miss your home. God's love flows down through the base of four positions, through the members of the home.
The source of love coming from God will be multiplied through parents first. If you separate yourself from your parents, it means you are cutting yourself off from God. Once you are married, can you be separated from each other? It means you separate East from West. You separate male from female, while they are created to become one. Can you separate plus elements and minus elements in an electric current? Being the parents, can you separate yourselves from your children? Separated, you will become satanic.
United, you will become divine. Those three levels must exist together, so if you separate from your parents, your spouses and your children, that's a satanic act. Evil history started when Adam and Eve separated from each other. What is evil, and what is sin, and what is the enemy of mankind? Separation, rather than unity. Unity and harmony are good. Disharmony and rupture are evil.
From this law of creation, when we see that in American society, the parents are apt to be separated from their children, would God leave it alone? Would American homes be prosperous this way? That's why, in American homes, the parents are unhappy and every member of the family is unhappy. It serves you right, when you are unhappy, because you have entertained that kind of idea. You deserve unhappiness. You deserve to have misery. The source of happiness is the family, and the family must have three levels of love: parental love, conjugal love, and children's love. All the children must be able to love their parents, and the parents between themselves must have conjugal love, and the children again have love toward their grandchildren. Only with those three levels of love existing in the family will you have real happiness. That being the Principle, that being the fundamental base of love, only by our living that kind of love in our families are we entitled to Heaven after we die.
You have the privilege to go to your parents in love. With love, you are entitled to reach your parents and your grandparents without reservation. That, in return, signifies that you are qualified to reach God and divine love.
You are entitled to go even to the king because in the family, your parents are· in the position of king and queen. Adam, at first, was in the position of the king to future mankind. God is the King of the whole universe. So with the love of the parents, you can reach your parents freely.
Likewise, you can reach God freely in the divine love endowed at the time of creation. God is above us, being the source. He is on the vertical line, and as we expand to the three levels of love we can easily reach God. Inside of God, the one who is most qualified to contact the president of the country is the one who loves the country most. If we have love towards our family, we can freely reach Him and occupy His home.
This comes from the base of four positions. Our having been able to find the theory of the four-position base enables us to solve any other problem existing in the whole world. This is the core of all theories. If you are asked the question, "Why do I live?" -- you can answer that you are living for the sake of your brothers and sisters on the horizontal level; you are living for the sake of your parents, in vertical love; you are living for your spouse and for your parents. This is the only way to reach God, in love. That is the purpose of lite.
Without our being able to do that, we cannot love any other human being. We cannot even love our nation. To have that expanded to a larger scope is to love the nation and mankind. If you can love others as you would your own brothers and sisters, other parents as you would your own parents, other grandparents as you would your own grandparents, then you can love God. Home life is the only place where you can be educated in that kind of love. Heavenly Kingdom is the place where love abounds in such a way that you would love everybody else like you would your own family members.
Why do you cry when you lose your children? Why do you cry when you lose your parents? Why do you cry when you lose your brothers and sisters? It is because the home base is the foundation of divine love, and if you lose one of your family members, you lose the opportunity to love that person. So the lost love would chase you out. You don't have a complete love. You lose the qualification to love with a wholesided love.
That's why you are being chased out; that makes you cry, makes you sad. Every member of your family can be likened to one of your cells. When you are pinched, you feel hurt. You don't frown, you cry. Then why would you want to get married, and want to have children? That is because you want to pass the exam and be a person created by love. If you pass the principles of love, you can have the earthly Kingdom of God, and the spiritual Kingdom of God. And you can even possess God. God will belong to you.
It is natural for any human being to want to marry. If a woman loves her husband more than she would her own self, she has the qualification to have God and participate in God's love. And if a man loves his wife more than he would his own self, he has the qualification to love God, possess God, and participate in God's love. If you are the same with your brothers and sisters, and with your parents, you have the qualification to belong to God and to possess God. This is why Jesus said, if you love your brothers and sisters more than you do your own self, there can be no greater love than this. The greater love must be God's love. If you don't put it into practice while you know the truth of it, you will be cut off from the love of God. The power of the universe will drive you out. Then you don't belong to the universe anymore, or to the category of divine love anymore. That's why you become sad. If you are harmonized and unite with that power of love, you'll become happy, and you will all smile and laugh.
For parents, grandparents and children to be separated is not the way it should be. By being in accordance with God's law in love, we can enter the Kingdom of God. By now, you must have a clear picture of what it is to have a solid foundation of four positions. The four position base is the foundation where love is solidified by being united into one in harmony under God's love. What is the ideal of creation? The ideal of creation is to establish the foundation for four positions in divine love.
Up to the present moment, there has been n" such thing as true parents in your own physical homes, nor true children in your own physical homes. This makes it impossible for God to play the role of the true God. God is a God of grief, a God of sorrow. You have been burdening Him. You have not been liberated in the love of God. There are national boundaries separating people from people, and race from race, and there are ruptures and disunity even in the home. In the Principle, we must be able to unite home life on that four position foundation, to reach God in divine love, and from there, as a core unit, we must start all over again, to organize tribe, nation, and world.
Without having true parents among us, we cannot give birth to true children, and everything starts from there. That's why God must send the Messiah to human society. It is to make it possible for mankind to build the true home, in order for God to become the true God, exercising His power. When can God become the real God?
It is only when man has true parents in human society, and through them the true world can be built, where divine love abides. To the immediate children of true parents, we the false children, must be engrafted, to make the whole human family. That's why fallen men need the Messiah as the Savior.