Sun Myung Moon
June 1, 1984
East Garden
Translator: San Kil Han (Through many parts True Father was speaking in English) Compiled from the original tape and notes by Brigitte Osterheld
This is the last part of True Father sharing his heart intimately with a smaller group of leaders and missionaries in East Garden, June 1, 1984. Father had tried before to inspire and push through the new project of delivering food to Christian communities with the new trucks he wanted to buy.)
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Father: Do everything like a lightning, not slowly but speedy. We do this way and care for nothing else, for some years and then some of you don't want to run for congress but you will find yourself sure in congress whether you like it or not, people will make you congress man. Would America perish then? No.
I know the miserable way. Which way are you to take? The normal or abnormal way? (Abnormal) Formal way or informal way? (Informal) Possible or impossible way? (Impossible)
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Rev. Moon likes formal or informal way? (Informal) Rev. Moon likes possible way or impossible? (Impossible) This is Incredible, out of common sense!
How about God? Which way, do you think, God will prefer? To follow man's decision is formal way. True Father likes to put in front of everything "in" "im" "un". It is different from American way or the ordinary way.
Moonies like the convenient or inconvenient way? (Inconvenient!) Ahhh ... (Father is making a funny sound, because he doesn't believe us)
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Always in Father's life Father chose the impossible way. You like ME, but you don't like Father's WAY. What about God then? God may not like Father but He likes Father's WAY.
God chose what? God didn't choose Rev. Moon but Rev. Moon's way. This is different.
How about you, Moonies? What you chose? (Father's way!) No, you chose Father! Moonies don't like Father's way!
Which one is most successful? Father or Father's way? (Father's way) Now you know…
The highest heaven is guaranteed if you follow Father's way.
Father has been cultivating that Father's Way because Father knows that's the best, it is necessary. That's why Father thought and acted like crazy. Father thought that morning was evening, that evening dust was the morning dawn – he couldn't distinguish them. He didn't even know whether he had lunch or what particular day in that moment was… Father lived this incredible way of life to be wise, going Father's way. All of Father's life Father kept himself busy to make sure that Father's Way could be understood.
Father always lived such a way of life like a marathon champion, running with this goal imminent every 100 meters, but you never know who will be the first, so Father kept on running just as if the goal was a 100 meters away. Father did that all his life. And this is exactly the way God has been feeling, and so Father couldn't feel in a different way.
Many people say that if you sleep with your clothes on you cannot feel rested, but Father knows that's wrong, that's ironic. Father, when he was really tired and was falling asleep without realizing it, then when he woke up after a few hours he felt most refreshed. It doesn't make a difference if he slept with clothes off or on.
That is the Heaven Father is going to. Are you all prepared to go to the same Heaven as Father? That kind of Heaven? Without living like that our conscience cannot permit us to stay in the same heaven as Father, it cannot permit us.
During these last two years along with the court trial; if Father didn't prepare in these two years; where would we be today? We would be quite unprepared. That's what Father never wanted to see: Miserable conditions, the miserable situation of Moonies, persecuted and martyred Moonies. That's what Father didn't want to see because Father saw already in the North Korean prison what the fate of the Moonies could be. That is one thing Father wanted to prevent. That's why Father lived like crazy. We are living different from the time when Father was in the North Korean prison because Father prepared. These are serious thoughts but most of us don't like serious thoughts.
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When the rain falls down then the same rain falls down where he is. All of us have that experience.
Until now Father never felt that he was outdone by any patriot that has ever lived in America.
Father knew that he was working harder for the cause of patriotism in America than any patriots
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Father knows that the last thing that God wants to see is that America perishes. Since Father knew this, Father pushed himself. Father doesn't want to be boastful to Americans, but Father wants that at least one American who can learn this. Father knows what he has done for this country and can leave without any regret or expectation that his hard work be realized and appreciated by American people. Father couldn't care less.
Do Father's job, work, then no regret.
Father is more interested that after living together with you for 10 years, more than 10 years, Father would like to see what YOU will become in the future. That's much more the concern of Father than how America would treat him. By the time when Father will leave America
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Father no longer will be with us, with you here. Father knows that. Even if Father leaves this country God must remain in this country. Do you know what that means? Even if Father leaves this country, God must remain in this country; to make sure that the world survives God must remain even after Father leaves this country.
In the meantime when Father will be aged and go to spirit world, Father would feel: My hard work in the past and even now I would feel rewarded when and if American members, namely you, in your late forties, in your early fifties with your white hair showing, come to Father, visit Father while Father is living in Korea and bow down deeply and perhaps with tears thank Father for what he did. And when Father sees such American members then Father would be consoled and feel rewarded. Father is not watching at himself, to decide if he is happy or unhappy, but Father is looking at YOU, according to the outcome of you, HOW you will become, that makes Father happy or unhappy. That is serious thinking that Father is doing now in these days. When Father thinks like that is this a good thinking or bad? (Good thinking) Good for whom? For Father himself? It is a good thinking in the view of God's providence.
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Father is looking at YOU, literally looking at you, and wishing that one day you will be the second God, you will be the small God, and that is what Father is waiting and praying for, nothing else.
Whether Father has tremendous influence in the world or anything, that's small compared to what Father looks YOU to be.
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When Father has this trying time it's not so much of Father we have to worry about but very much about ourselves, our future. Father feels much the same way as when Jesus said to the disciples when they were sorrowful: "Do not worry or weep over me, but weep over your own descendants". That's much the same as what Father feels. Do you understand what Father is saying? When Father goes away then there will be no one in this country who would cry, weep, or worry about his death and over the future of America. That's what Father is worried about. For more than 10 years in his life in America Father worked for that goal, with this intensity, and no one of us can deny that one fact. Do you understand?
First we must feel responsible. We must realize that in the course of the last few years of our intense activities here in America many European members dropped out; they just couldn't make it and also Japanese members couldn't hold themselves together and dropped off on that foundation for all our survival. Sometimes Father feels: If I didn't bring those Europeans from their own countries to America, maybe they wouldn't have dropped out. In the same way, if he had left Japanese members in Japan, even though they would have gone through incredible difficulties, they wouldn't have dropped off, they could continue. Father feels responsible for that. So, the Japanese and the Europeans members that came to this country, you should find them and praise them, be sympathetic with them. You should find them to do that rather than have them criticize Americans, feeling disgusted about Americans. You should never allow yourself to become like that. Even American people themselves internally no one says: Oh, the American government did right to Rev. Moon. All with a deep in heart feel: There is something wrong in America... this is not right. This is the way Americans feel. We feel sorry to Father.
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In the following Father is speaking mostly in English and with a low voice. It was very difficult to understand him from the tape. Here is what I have from the notes I made in that time):
Where in this point, was America indebted to Father or Father indebted to America? How about all of us? Is Father indebted to us or are we indebted to Father?
When we fundraised and we did incredible activities, if we ever complained, we didn't know that Father was always worse off than any members in difficulties. When you know that this was true, don't you feel ashamed?
That's a sad situation. Now we all have a heavy burden. If Father is not here and we want to pay him back, you cannot, only you have this time now, following that way, you did in front of Father and God. Do you follow me? Time goes so quickly, these three years are so historical, how precious is this time for you, to complete everything. This is so serious.
Father paved the way; you didn't have to do anything. How can you stand in the presence of God and Father? Do you follow me! DON'T LOSE THIS TIME, this precious time, don't lose it
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When you think about Father… Father needs much much money to prepare activities. Father had to pay so much money, i.e. the NCCSA movement, 250 trucks, almost six million dollars and mobile homes for the tours, 8.5 million dollars. So much money in such a few months; where does this money come from? And the Washington Times is now starting …
Think about how much money we need.
You didn't think so much about Father's situation…. We have many missionary countries, with difficult situations, they asking for help. Every day I hear reports, not good news, but bad news. Now in missionary countries there are complicated situations. Father doesn't have a country with … foundation.
Father is like a moving cloud, pushed in the wind, from east to west, he is in that kind of situation.
We cannot stick to a place, settle in a place.
My history is a lonely one, like a lonely gypsy, not knowing where I will be next… Father lives in that kind of situation.
Heavenly Father knew his situation, how difficult it was. There was only one who knew, that was God. There are many complicated situations. God helps Rev. Moon.
In this court case, it is the same situation. I cannot complain. I know the will of God. There is only one who knows the situation of Father, and this is Heavenly Father. I cannot feel comfortable.
Father can never change. God cannot help a changeable person.