I joined a fundraising team and soon started struggling. I decided that I wanted to meet God to strengthen my faith. So I made a 21-day cold shower condition, prayed, and slept very little, going out fundraising with roses in the streets of New York. The closer I came to the end of the twenty-one days, the more difficult became my day, with so much spiritual pressure that it seemed dark even in broad daylight. Then, at the end of the 21-day condition, our fundraising team had just been picked up by the church van, and I sat in the back, trying to go to the place where God lives in my prayer. Suddenly I was taken up into the spirit world. A giant orange oval light was in front of me.
I asked, “Are You God?” and the answer was, “Yes.” I looked closely and saw many holes in that orange light. So I asked, “Why the holes?” God said, “Each human being is my child and should fit like my counterpart. Yet because of the fall you don’t fit. You cannot truly meet me. Then I saw my own face, and it was spinning like in a time warp, going toward God while changing and changing. I was shown how it will be when I can finally meet God. The moment we met, I felt indescribable joy such as I have never felt before. I was overcome with tears, understanding that present human existence is like a black and white movie compared to the color version we have never seen.
Then God allowed me to experience His own heart, how He will feel when we meet. I felt overwhelming parental pride—the naive boundless pride a father feels watching his daughter doing something well, thinking she is just so great. I again cried, understanding that there is nothing unattached about His love. Then the light faded and I saw the number “4.” I saw fire springing out of that number. I “returned” to the van, contemplating the number “4.” It is the symbol of the Four-Position Foundation in the terminology of the Divine Principle—the foundation of the family, the eternal base of true love where God can dwell on earth and in Heaven.
I had many more experiences after that time, confirming the path I have chosen. It was not that I needed or was seeking more confirmation. Rather, I feel that following in the footsteps of True Parents enlightens the original mind and conscience and thereby provides evidence as a natural result.
From I Am in This Place, p. 45.