1975.10.28
Today was one of my most faithless days, I am very sorry to say. It was my own fault because yesterday was a pretty good day and there was a good foundation for today.
Yesterday I sold flowers in the morning and witnessed with Richard in Union Square and later at Powell and Market. But I really felt repentful because I hadn't brought anyone home, so I prayed when I came home, ate a light dinner, and later became Mitch's object as we ran some special errands.
We went first to The Gardens, which is where Onni and Dr. Durst live, but they weren't home, even though Jennifer, with her broken foot, and Elizabeth, her sister, and Juliette, Mitch's spiritual mother, were there. The spirits around that house were just incredible. Then we took a chair over to Hearst Street, but we ended up staying quite a while. Finally we left with Jackie, Sarah and a new sister, Linda.
Mitch shared a little with me about Ted Patrick, who is outwardly against the church and Reverend Moon and actually kidnaps Family members and deprograms them. But fortunately, some of them make it back. I had been totally unaware of him until Richard had mentioned him that afternoon.
I stayed up pretty late studying and talking with David and Mitch, and when I got up this morning I felt sick. I started a fast last night, but unwittingly I drank a cup of tea and ate a cookie which Mitch had brought to me, which consequently blew the whole gig. I finally threw up and felt much better, but I was still ignorant that I had violated my fast.
As the morning wore on I became more and more spaced out. By noon I could hardly stay awake. Poppy sent me to the library to repent and rest, but I fell asleep. Peter and Alex woke me up, so I went outside and lay on the grass and was instantly in spirit world. I woke up around 4:30, walked down to Powell and Market, and came home with Jackie, Bob, Dave and a guest, Rick.
Both David and Poppy said that violating a fast was about the worst thing you could do. It showed such insincerity. So now I must fast for three more days to pay the indemnity and hopefully turn this fiasco into a victory for heaven. Monsai!
Had a really good bar run tonight. Made about $20 in about 40 minutes, then went over to Berkeley where we had a family meeting. It was the first time I had met Onni. She spoke simply but so beautifully, with such conviction and such power. She welcomed us into the Family, and I really felt like she and Dr. Durst were our true parents. Fortune cookies were passed around. Mine were: "You have an unusual equipment for success. Be sure to use it properly"; "Your long forgotten kindness to someone will bring a substantial sum of money."
Tomorrow we will meet Father. I can hardly grasp the reality of meeting the messiah. Never in my life would I ever have dreamed of such a thing.